Blogging my way through wedding planning, crafts, life and all the unexpected events in between.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Un-Snubbed

I blogged earlier about how I felt a little snubbed by my bestie.  She had dropped off the face of the Earth a short while after we got engaged.  I was hurt and angry.  I also blogged here about how I confronted her and things were on the way up.  It's been a VERY long couple of months, with a very bumpy road,  but things are better. 


It's been an uphill battle to get things back to "normal."  But by all means, things are on the way there.  I guess I just needed to vent this out again, so it's your turn to be good listeners, er, readers and bear with me while I hash this out.  You have been so supportive about this before, I need your support one more time.  Well, one more time right now.  haha. 

Calls have become more regular and texting is building momentum.  There are still moments when I get the impending sense that there is a giant elephant on three way calling just waiting to trumpet during the conversation. 

We were chatting the other day she brought up coming for a visit.  Say whaaaaat?  I was of course, very excited, relieved, exhilarated, happy - all of it!  She planned out the visit so it would be spring break at school and I would be off from work.  Perrrrfecto. 

We ironed out some details: like her bringing her tea cup Yorkie with her (blechhhh for a very bad dog) and joining Mr. ST and I with his family for an early Easter.  She then mentioned going with me to see some bridal dresses and maybe visit our venue and church.  Everything was happpppy happpy happpy....

When I got off the phone I began to feel guilty.  Guilty for not having asked her to be in the bridal party yet.  Guilty for not sharing all the details of the wedding all the time.  Guilty for not telling her about this blog.  Guilty for writing posts that vented my feelings. 
                                                      I had a larrrrge amount of guilt. 

Why?!  Why was I so guilty?  I had gotten engaged.  I had not started a war, picked a fight, or said mean things.  Why was I THE ONE FEELING ALL THIS GUILT??? I talked with Mr. ST and he was his usual super amazing self.  He helped me realize that I had nothing to be guilty for.  I have all intentions of asking her to be in the bridal party when she comes to visit.  I also made the appointments for us to go play with dresses.  We're also planning on inviting over a few friends so she can see people she hasn't seen in a while. 


So.... this leaves us at waiting.  We texted last night to smooth out a few more details.  We're supposed to chat Sunday - so fingers crossed. 

Am I over-reacting?  You have been so helpful and supportive through this so far.  Any advice?  Anything wedding related you think I should plan for us to do?  Thanks!!!

 

3 comments:

Tracy said...

I went back and read your older posts about this- I think it's a common thing to have your friendships change. I'm going through something similar with my BFF. She is engaged as well, and you'd think we'd be closer than ever, but it's just the opposite. She's changed a LOT and I don't feel like she's willing to meet halfway- she seems to just want to be around her family/FI and is a lot less interested in her friends.
I'm glad to hear your situation seems to be improving. I don't think you have any reason to feel guilty, it's a hard thing to go through and it's hard to imagine or understand each other's sides without talking. Sometimes you do just need a place to vent! Good luck!

jacin {lovely little details} said...

so glad things are starting to look up!

GBR1980 said...

I don't think you have anything to be guilty about at ALL. I think its great she is making an effort to come and see you and do wedding stuff. I would go look at dresses with her and maybe treat her to lunch just the two of you. Definitely give her your wedding ideas and ask her opinons as well as to what she thinks.