Now, time for the tantrum. I will try to be as mature about this as I can.
Mr. ST and I got engaged almost a exactly a year ago. I know I voiced that I didn't want to have to wait TWO years to get married, but with our budget, we didn't have a choice. We would need the time to save money.
I drew that. I know, you are SUPER impressed.
I was elated!! MORE BRIDES TO PLAN WITH!!!!
Being as type A that I am, we had our date and venue booked and secured within the week of getting engaged. haha. I wanted to lock in at the current rate. Anyways, I was never worried someone else would pick our date. It was when all SEVEN of these couples began to plan and pick dates BEFORE ours. I didn't want to be engaged first then married last.
I know this sounds silly. I am TRULY happy for each and EVERY one of our friends getting married. It's just SO hard to sit here and WAIT and watch them get married before us. There is a small voice in my head that's telling me I will get to learn from what they do, or don't do. That's nice, but it still doesn't make the situation any better.
Am I being totally irrational about this? Did you have to wait and watch other people get married before your own day? Any suggestions or advice for how I should deal with this? Thanks!
5 comments:
OH yes girl, I go through this all the time. We got engaged almost a year ago and when all is said and done it will be 20 months that we were engaged. Like you, we wanted to save money and I wanted a spring wedding so we decided to wait. But I got so upset when couples that met after us got engaged and then married before us! I mean I know Groomzilla took a little longer than most to pop the question and I am glad that he finally did but just hate the waiting part. I of course am happy for these couples too. Is it totally rotten of me that I am afraid someone that would also be attending my wedding is going to ask to share one of my vendors that I put my blood sweat and tears into researching and get to use them before we get to use them!! I don't care if they ask after the wedding..lol! Does that make me selfish?
i'm with you on this. mathew and i have been engaged over a year (my birthday, july 17th marked 1 year) and it definitely is hard seeing friends get engaged after you and then get married before you. it definitely gets me upset some too but then i just think to myself "my wedding is going to be better!" haha. also, i'm with tiff on the fact that i don't want to share my vendors either. it's awful and it makes me selfish but dang it i worked really hard on finding all my vendors! all in all...don't worry, you're not alone at all!
I think it's normal to have those feelings, but you have to remember at the end of the day, it's not a race. And how fun will it be to take notes! You will figure out what works and what doesn't work!
The last two weddings I've been to, I've noticed that more than half of the favors get left on the tables! I'm not spending money on them. (And these were family weddings so I know the same aunts, uncles, and cousins that didn't take favors at a cousins wedding won't take them at mine)
Think of it as saving the best for last! You'll be able to learn from their mistakes and make any improvements. I don't think you are being irrational though, it's hard to wait although unfortunately there is not much else you can do! Just focus on your day and don't worry about what anyone else is doing- besides you have one of the best months!
everyone above is right. It's normal to think that way, and you will certainly learn a lot from attending these other weddings. I was one of the last of my friends to get married, but one of the first of my husband's friends..so we were kind of in the middle of the road there.
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