Breaking up make up friendship

So I blogged earlier, here, about how my "best friend" recently fell off the face of the Earth during the most important and exciting time of my life. *let me wipe up the dipping sarcasm*  Well, after a few attempts to get in touch and several long phone messages explaining situations we finally caught up. 

It took me several minutes of BSing to finally get to my point.  I was hurt.  I felt like I had been dumped by my best friend because I got engaged.  I tried not to place blame on either party, but address the current issues.  As I said before, she's got many things going on and her job is a P.I.T.A. job to say the least.  She did break-up with the guy she was dating too.  I felt like a big jerkie-mc-jerkerson that I hadn't been there for her through all of that. 

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I still feel like things are not back to normal.  I brought up how I feel that I cannot call her and talk to her about my wedding planning process.  There were comments made about how she is so far away and she wishes she could be here to go through this process with me but that it makes her upset that she can't because of the distance.  There were also comments about how we are at different places in our lives right now.  I know that we are in two different places: me = bridal brain, her = single working woman.  It's happened before that we have drifted apart here and there because of the distance, but it's never become a gorge between us like it is now.  But it's a two way friendship street. 

                                           

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I don't want to break-up with her....I just can't shake the feeling that this will happen closer to the wedding when I acutally need her for things and she'll be lost and out there and I won't know what to do.  I haven't asked her to be a part of the wedding party yet because I have this recurring nightmare of showing up to my wedding ceremony and she sends me a text saying she forgot and she's not coming.... :-(

I have no idea what to do....

Reason number 2897423492387 why I love my Florist.

I am completely aware of the fact that I have been avoiding you blog.  *Hanging my head in shame*

 The reason?

I found out that someone I know has found my blog!!!  It's preventing me from posting toooo many secrets just yet.  I have to wait a bit longer to post the BM cards.  Promise, they are done, photos are ready...just have to wait a biiiiit longer. :-) If TM is reading this, I hope you're still surprised later - I'm sure your lawerly skills are hard at work deducing what in the world I am hinting at - Haha. 

So back to the title of my post.  I got an email from my Florist the other day.  This is it:

http://myemail.constantcontact.com/Save-the-Date-.html?soid=1101712477528&aid=5h_6hdWoHFk

I tried in vain to paste it in here so you don't have to click the link, but I could not figure it out.  sorrrrrrry. 

Anywho, how ADORABLE is this STD style email?  Sooo cute.  Makes me very happy inside that I, er - um, the the FH and I picked him as our florist.  :-)

Two maids in a pod

Well, Jamaica was amazing.  Ah-May-Zing.  Please do go to Negril and watch the sunset one time in your life....out over the lagoon...the water turned the most beautiful shades of indigo...the sky was magnificently streaked with oranges, golds, and pinks.  I could go on and on, but I'll spare you all those details.  Awwww - The FH and I at sunset.  He has just tried to throw me into the water, hence the funny stance together.  lol.

(personal photo)

The FH and I just found out his sister is going to have a baby GIRL!   I am OVER THE MOON about this because the little doll will be about 15 months old when we get married and I cannot WAIT to put her in a tiny white dress that matches mine and drag her down the isle.  Well, hopefully she is isn't cranky that day and will go willingly, otherwise, I'll drag away. 

But back to some 'maids.  I asked my first Matron on Honor while we were away.  She has become a fantastic friend in just a short amount of time. I know there will be very few people who will be able to handle me as well on the "big day" as she can.  She's a no nonsense lady and will certainly keep everyone in the BP in line.  Plus I've kidnapped her and forced at almost knife point to attend numerous brial expos and events and register to win me honeymoons at said events.  She teared up a bit and we had a good hug and laugh. 

(personal photo - MofH NM on the left and Me right after I asked...)

 

I will be creating a BP card to post the pictures because of course in my excitement to make the last one I took one picture when I started, got going with the Cricut and then took one when I finished.  Duh....I was excited about vacation.  Who could blame me?

Feeling Snubbed

Happy New Year!  I cannot believe that it's 2011.  That means I can say I'm getting married NEXT YEAR!! haha.  So excited!!!

I asked one BM, and am going to ask another  (A Matron of Honor) when we go on vacation to JAMAICA this week.  And I PROMISE to post the DIY of the cards as soon as we get back (sorry I've had 28+ inches of snow on the east coast to deal with plus packing for the warm sandy beaches of Jamaica - you can see why I didn't post any of the card yet. lol. :-) )   

But as for the rest of the BP and when I'm going to ask them that will happen over the next several months.  I want all to be asked by April/May.  The FH and I decided on 7 people each.  We have lots of friends and knew we would always want a big BP.  And this is supposed to be the happiest time of my life and my best friend should be up my butt about this - if not at least just SUPER excited...right!  Right?

Not so much. I have been waiting to write about this for some time now.  It's been a major thorn in my side since November.  I've always waxed and waned with girlfriends.  They moved away, we would go to different schools, etc., and it never really bothered me. 

I met said current BFF in college.  She was a year behind me and I was her Resident Assistant during her freshman year.  We pledged a sorority together and we were very much inseparable after that.  We've had our ups and downs and have gone through all the typical girl-friend things: break-ups with boys, fights in bars with other girls, deaths, engagements of our friends, marriages of our friends, moving, moving in with boys, moving out from boys.  She was around for the beginning stages of my relationship with the FH.  He has always treated her as fabulously as he treats me (he's a smart man in that sense - all my girlfriends love him).  Well, she moved to Boston after graduation and I stayed in Dirty Jersey.  It didn't put too much a damper on our friendship.  We would chat at least every day if not twice a day.  She had been supportive of my new job last year, and the FH and I buying a house. 
She came for a visit in June and I knew we were in different places in our lives, but that had never bothered us before.  I was happy in my new home living with my then boyfriend and not yet FH.  She wanted to get wasted each night and go see an old college flame every night. I had planned out all these fun things for us to do and she wanted a stupid boy.  I was hurt, but let it go. 
 We got engaged in August and at first she thought I was joking (but I must admit that I had pulled an April Fool's on her a few times and faked her out before)  but she believed me eventually and was ecstatic. 
Fast forward to November.  My birthday.  I didn't hear from her until AFTER I texted her at 10:30 P.M.  She had met a knew guy, and was having a bust time at work.  However, I didn't think that warrented that she not text or call me on my bday.  Turns out she was with new guy at a Celtics game.  Ouch.  I'm still hurting from this.  She called the next day, but sorry...busted. 
So that brings us to today.  We haven't talked in over a month.  I invited her and new boy down for New Years and didn't hear from her until I sent her a nasty text somewhere around December 27. 
Here is my dilema.  I had always assumed she would be my Maid of Honor.  Now...I don't know if I even want to ask her to be part of the wedding.  This is supposed to be the MOST amazing time of my life and I haven't talked to one of my closest friends in over a month.  I don't even know how to describe what I'm feeling anymore.  I'm starting to ask girl to be part of this day with me....and now I can't bring myself to admit I may no longer have a BFF. 

Did you experience a change in any of your friends when you got engaged?  How did you deal?  Is this an unusual experience?